The post below was written at the beginning of 2016.
In the thick of parenting, five children, yet knowing that I’d had my last baby and mentally trying to prepare myself to do something other than ‘mothering’.
Four years on and wow, how things have changed!
I wanted to share it again because I know there are some of you out there feeling uncertain. Unsure of what there is next for you. Especially mums. Because after embracing it, drowning in it, surviving it – if you aren’t mothering, then what are you?
There is a place and a purpose for you – I promise.
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I’ve just read an article by Elizabeth Gilbert entitled “Life Advice“.
I found myself nodding a lot. And while I was deep in the context of the read, I was jotting down notes like a mo-fo, and I was 100% feeling what she was putting out there.
It made me feel excited, and I was finally hopeful that I may be able to find the answer to my never-ending question, “What am I doing with my life?“
A question, I believe, a lot of stay-at-homes Mums ask themselves as we are winding up the whole parenting gig – yes I know it never ends, but you know what I mean… Hopefully.
We are all on limited time here, so let me break the article down for you as it is a pretty long read. I’ll do my best to get some nods rolling from your gorgeous heads, and then we’ll discuss the mass confusion it has made me feel and see if you feel it too.
To read the full, blessed article, click here. To read the bits and bobs I jotted down – which are her words not my own – then keep reading…
Her “life advice” comes simplified (although also thoroughly expanded on) into four everyday words: Hobby; Job; Career; Vocation.
These “life advice” words completely surprised me! They were not the words I had predicted seeing before clicking on the link. Perhaps this goes to show how life-advice-smart I am (or more so am not)!
Let’s expand on them so you can find your four…
- Hobby: This is something you do for pleasure, relaxation, distraction or mild curiosity. Hobbies are mellow. Everyone should have a hobby, but you don’t need one.
- Job: A job is something you do to financially support yourself – lol if you didn’t know that then you may need more help than this page can offer you! What’s important to know is your job does not define you. A job is vital but don’t make it YOUR LIFE – it’s just a job. You need to have a job – even if you are entirely financially supported…
- Career: This is something that you build up over the years with energy, passion and commitment. A career is best done with excitement, it requires ambition, strategy and hustle. A career is a choice. Care about it if you have one – but not everyone needs to have a career. Career and jobs can overlap, but a job is just a job you have to do while a career is something you have built.
- Vocation: This is your calling! While a career is about relationships between you and the world, your vocation is about the relationship between you and God (or the Universe as I prefer to say). A career is dependent on others, while vocation belongs only to you. Your vocation can be anything that brings you to life and makes you feel like your soul is animated by purpose. A vocation is a private vow, it is sacred, and it is a must!
So with this beautiful information jotted down in my diary, I began to wonder what were my four?
Seriously, what are my four?
My pen tapped the page over and over, but nothing came out, well nothing legible at least. Even when I tried joining the dots, there was still nothing there to read in to.
It’s hard to decipher when you wear so many hats in life; as do most of us do, but I was not sure what fits where and how well it fits me—the real me, not just the mother-me.
I don’t know what my sacred vocation is. Is it my dabbling in writing, my love of all things home with Interior Styling, or is it something I haven’t even discovered yet, something more profound?
What I would class as my job when 90% of my life’s commitment is all things motherhood but, hang on a sec, we don’t get paid for that so does it count?! Excuse me where are the SAHM union? Put them on the phone!!
My hobby, my distraction … Ummm…. hello Facebook you distract me so it must be you! Or is this where my writing belongs because I can while away hours at a time tapping at the keyboard… Or perhaps my obsession with house plans, yes house plans, drawing them by hand, drawing them on the computer, redrawing other people’s coz I think I can do it better…
What about my career? Is this my Styling or will it one day be my writing – I get excited and passionate about both! Hell, I get excited spending hours drawing house plans and looking through houses too…
Do you see my confusion?!
Anyone out there know their four for sure?
Impress me with them – go on!